Okay, so I know that I am probably going to tick at least one person off with this blog, and I hope that if your feelings are hurt or if you disagree entirely that it is because you feel I am off basis biblically, if so, please enlighten me. However, if it is your personal beliefs and traditions which are challenged then honestly that is what I am trying to do!
Okay so I have been doing a lot of research on this, and have questioned many experienced followers of Christ, and gathering data about how others feel by what they write, talk and act on certain things. I have taken time and effort to put this together, hence why I have been silent for awhile. Well on with it,
So I do wedding photography, and I love the beauty of the intricate dynamics which intertwine to produce the event which is to followers of Christ, the epic event of imagery which is the coming together of Christ and His bride, us, the extended church. And because this is the focal point, there are many who will militantly defend the traditions and even some "superstitions" which are surrounding weddings. So my goal is to do three things, first strip away traditions, superstitions, and "developments" of the modern wedding ceremony, and second to propose a few new ways to look at wedding ceremonies, and the functions of these ceremonies, third to challenge people and churches who are so militantly entrenched in unbiblical traditionalism, and superstition defense to maybe drop the stance towards that which does not effect the "gospel" of marriage.
Here are some great, reputable sources.
http://www.pibweddings.com/traditionsorigins.html
http://www.aomdj.com/traditio.htm
http://ashleysbrideguide.com/the_wedding_scoop/article/cant-decide-if-you-want-to-have-a-first-look-don-yeager-advice/
And I am sure that there are many many more resources and there is always trudging through google.
Okay, so I am actually going to refer the reader to a couple of websites where I get this information, because there is just too much to cover. First, many brides will wear white as to indicate their "virginity", or purity. However this was not the original custom. Many wore whatever dress they could, then in 1840's Queen Victoria wore a white dress for the royal wedding, rather than the Royal silver dress in the past, and then the rich began copying this trend, and so to quote one persons reporting of this, "it was vanity, not virginity which started this trend". There are others which have different brides at different periods which wore white dress, but none of them actually for cause of virginity.
Okay so moving on to something that some church's wedding planners have been quite enforcing, the groom not seeing the bride before they walk in. Tradition, this is only tradition, however if anyone bride, groom, photographer, would suggest that the bride and groom have a "moment" before the actually ceremony and you might have a crucifix pulled on you and sprinkled with holy water.
Okay, the hot topic where ministers, photographers and couples clash, flash at the wedding. Most often the more conservative the denomination, the more strict the rules are. The argument stands, in their side of the court, that because this is a "sacred ceremony", a "worship service", a "holy institution", etc when the bride walks in there shall cease to be flash photography. Each to their own, and I have no problem with a church creating rules for their ceremony. Where I have the problem is when they enforce them vis a vie biblical reasons.
Here are my questions which have yet to be satisfactorily answered to this topic. First , if the reason why this is a holy ceremony and should have no "distractions" caused by flash because it would take away from the holiness of the event as it depicts Christ and his bride, then the flash should stop when the groom enters, as he is the representative of Christ, not the bride. Secondly, this "holy event" has had holiness set upon it, as tradition in the church has not held such a protective stance, in my opinion it appears this is mostly a reaction to the recent decline in marriage, and some more "expressive" forms of the ceremony. What I find interesting is that the professional photographer is told not to flash, but I have yet to have the brides mother escorted out of the ceremony for pulling out her camera and flashing away. So while I think there might be a more "correct" way to hold a ceremony, there perhaps needs to be a little less rigidity forced upon something that is only in the last few hundred years been formed to what it is today.
Biggest question, why have a ceremony at all? In ancient times ceremonies were not what they are today, often just feasts, eating, drinking, just two families coming together, no exchange of vows, rings etc. Each culture has something different to add over time, and is a spectrum, that often times conservatives, who often also only preside in a sliver of the spectrum that is "christianity", are the ones who carve out a sliver from the wedding spectrum and dub it "gospel".
So lets take a long hard look at what weddings really are, what are traditions and superstitions and other things that can be tinkered with, and preserve the core of what is wedding.
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